I guess we kind of fell off the face of the blog world lately. Things here have been so busy, so much going on! The end of the school year is always insane, and I've been a little under the weather too. The good news is, the school year is over and I'm finally feeling better, so maybe life can return to normal. We've been trying to kick off the summer with a little fun. We've done the Dollywood thing, seen "Up" (fabulous!), hung out a lot downtown, gone to the Reading Festival, played a lot outside, and tomorrow we'll head to Nana and Granddaddy's for our first swim of the summer! We also have been in the process of updating a bunch of our adoption paperwork (it's that time!) and had our annual home visit with our social worker on Tuesday. Apparently we still appear to be suitable parents. : )
Greg and I head to Seattle on Thursday morning, catching an early morning flight. We'll spend several days there and will head up to Vancouver for a day as well. It's fun when someone likes your hubby's music so much that they fly him across the country for a couple of shows, and you get to tag along! We plan to visit some of the places we saw last time, actually go up the Space Needle this time, do a little biking and whale watching, and then explore Vancouver for the first time. It will be fun to spend some time away, just the two of us. Then just a few days after our getaway, we'll make our annual trip down to St. Augustine, which is quite honestly my favorite week of the entire year. We have so much fun and do some serious relaxing! I'm curious to see how many sharks we can catch this year, and I think we'll all be sticking a little closer to shore thanks to last year's shark experience!
I'll try to do a better job of keeping up, as I enjoy my paid 10 week vacation. Yes, my job rules!
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Monday, April 13, 2009
What I Learned Last Week
Saturday was the official one year mark of waiting for Claire, but really this month marks two years of waiting. We decided to adopt in April of '07, with the intention of adopting from China, but then switching to Taiwan in November of '08 to avoid a long wait. China's wait is still ridiculous, but we definitely haven't avoided the long wait.
Last week was for sure, one of the most difficult weeks of my 30 years. We found out Monday that our file had been shown to a birthmother, and that she hadn't chosen us. We also found out that another couple from our agency in our program got a referral. While we are joyful that there is movement in our program, and our file is actively being shown, it was still hard to not be the one getting the referral. I pretty much fell apart on Monday morning, and have slowly put the pieces back together over the past week. I think I'm better now, I'm just so exhausted, and it's not shocking that I have a horrible migraine today. But, I did learn a few things this past week...some adoption related and some not:
1. I have an amazing husband who pushes me and sticks by me when I want to give up. He never lets me get away with anything, and it makes me so mad sometimes. He knows what I'm capable of and the deepest desires of my heart, and he never lets me settle for anything less.
2. I have the sweetest little boy! He told me all week that he was "taking care of me" because I was having a hard week. He also now holds doors for me and any ladies he sees while we're out. He always says, "Ladies first!" It cracks me up! I ran into a former student last week, and Connor just randomly sticks out his hand and shakes the little boy's hand and says, "Nice to meet ya!" Hilarious! He has his moments, he gets a little wound up, but he truly is a really, really great kid!
3. Enrolling your baby for Kindergarten is horrible! You better believe that I teared up right there in that school office! It can't be time!
4. Apparently my hip, knees, and ankles are shot at the ripe ole' age of 30! I started physical therapy for sciatic nerve pain that has been appearing off and on since August. So it seems that being super flexible was beneficial for dancing most of my life, and not so much as I'm getting older. I was told to stop running which totally stinks, because I was shaving time off my mile like crazy and was planning on running a 5K soon. My PT says I might be able to start running again if we can get everything strengthened up. It's a fun day when your therapist brings over other therapists to look at your range of motion, your knees, and your ankles, and they all exclaim, "Wow!"
5. There is NEVER a reason to pay full price for any toiletry item, paper product, cleaning product, etc. if you will just clip coupons from your Sunday paper and watch the sales ads. This week I got all these items for free or under $1: Toothpaste, deoderant, Glade Plug-Ins, various cleaning products, papertowels, washing detergent, razors, etc. etc. etc. I also bought two weeks worth of groceries for $100 and used $40 in coupons!
6. I am ready for a new house! I'm ready for a bigger yard for my kids to run around in! Hopefully the economy starts looking up soon, so we can possibly move in the next two years! I'm ready to be where we're going to be for the next 20 years, and that is definitely not here!
7. I don't know why we were asked to adopt. I don't know why I didn't feel led to just get pregnant two years ago when we wanted to add to our family. I don't know why we've been asked to have our children 6 years or more apart. I don't like not knowing why, and I certainly don't like not getting my way! I do know that I can't wait for the day I get my baby girl's picture and I know the answers to all of those questions!
8. God is real, his timing is definitely not our timing, and you can hate it all you want, but there is nothing you can do but trust.
Last week was for sure, one of the most difficult weeks of my 30 years. We found out Monday that our file had been shown to a birthmother, and that she hadn't chosen us. We also found out that another couple from our agency in our program got a referral. While we are joyful that there is movement in our program, and our file is actively being shown, it was still hard to not be the one getting the referral. I pretty much fell apart on Monday morning, and have slowly put the pieces back together over the past week. I think I'm better now, I'm just so exhausted, and it's not shocking that I have a horrible migraine today. But, I did learn a few things this past week...some adoption related and some not:
1. I have an amazing husband who pushes me and sticks by me when I want to give up. He never lets me get away with anything, and it makes me so mad sometimes. He knows what I'm capable of and the deepest desires of my heart, and he never lets me settle for anything less.
2. I have the sweetest little boy! He told me all week that he was "taking care of me" because I was having a hard week. He also now holds doors for me and any ladies he sees while we're out. He always says, "Ladies first!" It cracks me up! I ran into a former student last week, and Connor just randomly sticks out his hand and shakes the little boy's hand and says, "Nice to meet ya!" Hilarious! He has his moments, he gets a little wound up, but he truly is a really, really great kid!
3. Enrolling your baby for Kindergarten is horrible! You better believe that I teared up right there in that school office! It can't be time!
4. Apparently my hip, knees, and ankles are shot at the ripe ole' age of 30! I started physical therapy for sciatic nerve pain that has been appearing off and on since August. So it seems that being super flexible was beneficial for dancing most of my life, and not so much as I'm getting older. I was told to stop running which totally stinks, because I was shaving time off my mile like crazy and was planning on running a 5K soon. My PT says I might be able to start running again if we can get everything strengthened up. It's a fun day when your therapist brings over other therapists to look at your range of motion, your knees, and your ankles, and they all exclaim, "Wow!"
5. There is NEVER a reason to pay full price for any toiletry item, paper product, cleaning product, etc. if you will just clip coupons from your Sunday paper and watch the sales ads. This week I got all these items for free or under $1: Toothpaste, deoderant, Glade Plug-Ins, various cleaning products, papertowels, washing detergent, razors, etc. etc. etc. I also bought two weeks worth of groceries for $100 and used $40 in coupons!
6. I am ready for a new house! I'm ready for a bigger yard for my kids to run around in! Hopefully the economy starts looking up soon, so we can possibly move in the next two years! I'm ready to be where we're going to be for the next 20 years, and that is definitely not here!
7. I don't know why we were asked to adopt. I don't know why I didn't feel led to just get pregnant two years ago when we wanted to add to our family. I don't know why we've been asked to have our children 6 years or more apart. I don't like not knowing why, and I certainly don't like not getting my way! I do know that I can't wait for the day I get my baby girl's picture and I know the answers to all of those questions!
8. God is real, his timing is definitely not our timing, and you can hate it all you want, but there is nothing you can do but trust.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Finally Found Claire's Nursery!!!!
I have two things for Claire! I have a precious sweater made by her Mimi, and I have a baby sling. That's it! I haven't allowed myself to buy anything, because it just makes it so hard having all of it around while you are waiting. I told myself that once we hit the one year mark, I'd slowly begin to get some things here and there. I know it's strange, but I guess when you're in this position, you just do as many things as you can to make it easier! We're hitting the one year mark on Saturday, so I had to announce to Greg last night that the shopping will now begin!!
Although I haven't bought anything, I've been looking for Claire's nursery for over a year! I have not been able to find anything that I just love until yesterday! I thought I'd look on the internet on my lunch break, and I can't believe that I found it! It is exactly what I've been looking for, simple and calming...and to top it all off it's monogrammed, and if you know me, you know I adore monogramming! We have to update our homestudy in the Fall, and I'd like to send a new picture book since the pictures they have will be two years old at that point. I'd love to include a picture of her nursery with it! Looks like I've found my summer project!
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Adoption Frequently Asked Questions
Greg again.......
I read one of these on another adoption blog and thought it might be useful for us to have one of these since we get asked a lot of the same questions over and over. Please know, we don't mind you asking and we love talking about our adoption so if you've asked one of these questions, please don't feel like it annoyed us... not at all. We just wanted to put all of these answers in one place.
Why are you adopting from Taiwan?
Our original plan was to adopt from China. Unfortunately as we learned more and more about the China adoption process, it became evident to us that we needed to look in another direction. Wait times in China have gone to over 5 years from start of process to referral (and 5 years is being kind based on the current speed... if they maintain the pace they've had for the past year it would be a 9 year wait). We looked into Taiwan, Nepal, Vietnam, and Korea. After looking over all of them, we felt like Taiwan was the best fit for our family. After visiting Taiwan last December, that decision was 100% confirmed... we fell in love with Taiwan... it feels like home.
When will Claire be here?
We wish we knew! We "officially" got in line on April 11th, 2008. From that date, we were told 18-24 months until referral. That's just a guess... not a guarantee. Some families are currently waiting much longer than that... some less. After referral, it will take anywhere from 4-8 more months before all of the paperwork and court proceedings will be finished. So the soonest we would hope to have Claire home would be early 2010 and the longest would be mid to late 2011. We're praying for early 2010.
How old will Claire be when she comes home?
Good question... when we get the referral she will be anywhere from 2 months to a year old. The average wait to travel is about 6 months so the youngest she would be is probably 8 months and the oldest is about 18. We're really, really hoping for younger. Obviously the older she gets, the more challenging the adjustment period will be.
How will you be matched with Claire?
Almost every country has a different process... I've been surprised at the number of people who think there is a catalog full of babies and we just pick one out. They're confusing that with mail order brides. At Cathwel, the orphanage we are working with in Taiwan, they work with the birth mother to place their child with a family the birth mother is comfortable with. At some point, a birth mom who has just had a little girl will be presented with 4 or 5 families to choose from. Every family has provided a detailed home study, a picture album, and a short one page letter to the birth mother. At some point God willing, our file will be presented and a birth mother will choose us.
Can you guys not just have another kid on your own?
As far as we know, we can. We had Connor without too much trouble and there is no medical issue keeping us from having another child. We have chosen to adopt because we believe it is something God has called us to do. Jessica and I both have felt called to deeper service and when we looked at the world we realized that there were a million problems we didn't have the means to solve but taking in an orphan was something we could do. As far as we're concerned, Claire is already a part of her family... we just haven't met her yet.
How much is this going to cost?
Wow... getting a bit personal aren't you? Well, since you asked I don't mind talking about it. I'll break it down:
* Homestudy - $1000
* Application fee - $200
* Agency fees - $2500
* Homeland Security paperwork (I-600A) - $700
* Various paperwork and up front fees - about $1000
* Orphanage / Taiwan court fees - $10,000
* Travel expenses - $5000
Out of that, we've already spent close to $5000. All we really have coming up is our orphanage fee which we'll pay upon referral... that will be $10,000 all in one chunk. 4-6 months after that we will have to pay to travel... along with an extra plane ticket home for Claire. Grant total... about 20,000. We also took a trip to Taiwan already which set us back about $4,000. So when it's all said and done, this process will be nearly $25,000.
Greg's a pastor, Jessica's a teacher... how can you afford that?
There's a very simple answer to that... we rob liquor stores. Okay, not really... there are two simple answers though. (1) Dave Ramsey. Seriously... do his system. It works. We're almost out of debt and our finances have never been better, even with the economy being so horrible. Ramsey is the man. (2) God will provide. When we started this, we KNEW we couldn't afford it. We still can't... but God has made a way. When we needed $2500 for our agency fee, we didn't have it... until we got a completely unexpected gift from my sweet grandmother. We couldn't afford our trip to Taiwan... until I was hired to design a website which paid for our entire hotel bill for the week we were there. There have been a lot of little things like that... things that just fall into our laps at just the right time. We're currently saving the $10,000 for our orphanage fee. We're nowhere close and I'm not real sure where it's going to come from but I know it will be there. We said it when we started and we'll say it now... if God asked us to do this (and we believe he did), then He will make sure we can pay for it. I still don't know how that's going to work, but so far, it has.
How long will you be in Taiwan when you go to get Claire?
Taiwan only requires that we be there about a week. Once we arrive in Taipei, we'll probably be able to pick up Claire the very next day. We'll have a couple of court appointments that week and after that we can come home.
Will Connor go with you?
If he's six, no. If he's eight, probably.
Okay... that's all the questions I could think of... if you have any other questions you've been wondering about but didn't want to ask, now's your chance. Just leave them in the comments and I'll update this post to include your questions.
I read one of these on another adoption blog and thought it might be useful for us to have one of these since we get asked a lot of the same questions over and over. Please know, we don't mind you asking and we love talking about our adoption so if you've asked one of these questions, please don't feel like it annoyed us... not at all. We just wanted to put all of these answers in one place.
Why are you adopting from Taiwan?
Our original plan was to adopt from China. Unfortunately as we learned more and more about the China adoption process, it became evident to us that we needed to look in another direction. Wait times in China have gone to over 5 years from start of process to referral (and 5 years is being kind based on the current speed... if they maintain the pace they've had for the past year it would be a 9 year wait). We looked into Taiwan, Nepal, Vietnam, and Korea. After looking over all of them, we felt like Taiwan was the best fit for our family. After visiting Taiwan last December, that decision was 100% confirmed... we fell in love with Taiwan... it feels like home.
When will Claire be here?
We wish we knew! We "officially" got in line on April 11th, 2008. From that date, we were told 18-24 months until referral. That's just a guess... not a guarantee. Some families are currently waiting much longer than that... some less. After referral, it will take anywhere from 4-8 more months before all of the paperwork and court proceedings will be finished. So the soonest we would hope to have Claire home would be early 2010 and the longest would be mid to late 2011. We're praying for early 2010.
How old will Claire be when she comes home?
Good question... when we get the referral she will be anywhere from 2 months to a year old. The average wait to travel is about 6 months so the youngest she would be is probably 8 months and the oldest is about 18. We're really, really hoping for younger. Obviously the older she gets, the more challenging the adjustment period will be.
How will you be matched with Claire?
Almost every country has a different process... I've been surprised at the number of people who think there is a catalog full of babies and we just pick one out. They're confusing that with mail order brides. At Cathwel, the orphanage we are working with in Taiwan, they work with the birth mother to place their child with a family the birth mother is comfortable with. At some point, a birth mom who has just had a little girl will be presented with 4 or 5 families to choose from. Every family has provided a detailed home study, a picture album, and a short one page letter to the birth mother. At some point God willing, our file will be presented and a birth mother will choose us.
Can you guys not just have another kid on your own?
As far as we know, we can. We had Connor without too much trouble and there is no medical issue keeping us from having another child. We have chosen to adopt because we believe it is something God has called us to do. Jessica and I both have felt called to deeper service and when we looked at the world we realized that there were a million problems we didn't have the means to solve but taking in an orphan was something we could do. As far as we're concerned, Claire is already a part of her family... we just haven't met her yet.
How much is this going to cost?
Wow... getting a bit personal aren't you? Well, since you asked I don't mind talking about it. I'll break it down:
* Homestudy - $1000
* Application fee - $200
* Agency fees - $2500
* Homeland Security paperwork (I-600A) - $700
* Various paperwork and up front fees - about $1000
* Orphanage / Taiwan court fees - $10,000
* Travel expenses - $5000
Out of that, we've already spent close to $5000. All we really have coming up is our orphanage fee which we'll pay upon referral... that will be $10,000 all in one chunk. 4-6 months after that we will have to pay to travel... along with an extra plane ticket home for Claire. Grant total... about 20,000. We also took a trip to Taiwan already which set us back about $4,000. So when it's all said and done, this process will be nearly $25,000.
Greg's a pastor, Jessica's a teacher... how can you afford that?
There's a very simple answer to that... we rob liquor stores. Okay, not really... there are two simple answers though. (1) Dave Ramsey. Seriously... do his system. It works. We're almost out of debt and our finances have never been better, even with the economy being so horrible. Ramsey is the man. (2) God will provide. When we started this, we KNEW we couldn't afford it. We still can't... but God has made a way. When we needed $2500 for our agency fee, we didn't have it... until we got a completely unexpected gift from my sweet grandmother. We couldn't afford our trip to Taiwan... until I was hired to design a website which paid for our entire hotel bill for the week we were there. There have been a lot of little things like that... things that just fall into our laps at just the right time. We're currently saving the $10,000 for our orphanage fee. We're nowhere close and I'm not real sure where it's going to come from but I know it will be there. We said it when we started and we'll say it now... if God asked us to do this (and we believe he did), then He will make sure we can pay for it. I still don't know how that's going to work, but so far, it has.
How long will you be in Taiwan when you go to get Claire?
Taiwan only requires that we be there about a week. Once we arrive in Taipei, we'll probably be able to pick up Claire the very next day. We'll have a couple of court appointments that week and after that we can come home.
Will Connor go with you?
If he's six, no. If he's eight, probably.
Okay... that's all the questions I could think of... if you have any other questions you've been wondering about but didn't want to ask, now's your chance. Just leave them in the comments and I'll update this post to include your questions.
Monday, April 6, 2009
Adoption Update
Greg writing........
This coming Saturday is a big day in our adoption wait... this Saturday will be April 11th which will mark 1 year of waiting from our initial log-in date at Cathwel Services where we will be adopting from in Taiwan. When we started this process, we were told it would take us 18-24 months to get a referral (a referral is when we are matched with a child in Taiwan... we'll get pictures and a short video of the child) and then another 4-8 months after that before all of the court processes and paperwork would be finished so we could go and bring her home.
I'll be honest... these 12 months have not been all that difficult... until recently. There is one great discourager for those waiting for adoptions and I've been guilty of drinking from that fountain a bit too often lately... I'm talking about internet adoption forums.
Over on the Taiwan adoption groups, it seems that many people who were told 18-24 months (by different agencies... not ours) have now been waiting well beyond 24 months... some as many as 30-31 months and still don't have a referral. If you were in my shoes, this would be incredibly discouraging to you... you kind of prepare yourself for how long you think you can wait and 24 months to us is an eternity... the thought of waiting longer than that is almost unbearable.
What makes it so tough is that we're watching Connor grow up before our eyes. He's 5 years old now... if our wait stretches to the worst case scenario of let's say 36 months... add 6 months before we travel and that's 42 months... 30 months from now. Connor will be about to turn 8. That's not what we had in mind for our family. We realized that our kids were going to be pretty far apart but the thought of it going any further than we had originally anticipated is tough to swallow.
So yeah... lately the wait has been weighing heavily on us. It's so hard not knowing how long it's going to be... and knowing that some people out there are waiting 30 months plus is heartbreaking. I won't lie... we've thought about just trying to get pregnant and dropping out of the program.
However... God has a way of giving hope to the hopeless and I believe that came to us today. We found out this morning that another family from our agency received a healthy infant girl referral this past Friday... they waited only 8 months... the little girl is 2 months old. That's pretty huge... the biggest part of that news is that we found out that our dossier has been shown to a birth mother at least once. We weren't chosen, but we were presented. We didn't expect this to happen for many more months... for it to be happening already is a very good sign.
It's a rollercoaster... even the good news (like what we found out today) can leave you feeling worse. As the time creeps on, it seems like it occupies more and more of our thoughts. There's such an obvious hole in our family... Jessica and I both want to be parents again and Connor is such a sweet and wonderful kid... he's going to be an incredible big brother for Claire... even he can sense that our family is incomplete. The longer this goes, the more painful that missing piece of our family seems to become.
We'll continue to keep you posted on any news. Please pray for us to have peace as we wait and pray for our referral to come sooner rather than later... and join us as we celebrate having one year of waiting behind us. We're glad to have that one finished and as the Counting Crows once said... "there's reason to believe... maybe this year will be better than the last."
This coming Saturday is a big day in our adoption wait... this Saturday will be April 11th which will mark 1 year of waiting from our initial log-in date at Cathwel Services where we will be adopting from in Taiwan. When we started this process, we were told it would take us 18-24 months to get a referral (a referral is when we are matched with a child in Taiwan... we'll get pictures and a short video of the child) and then another 4-8 months after that before all of the court processes and paperwork would be finished so we could go and bring her home.
I'll be honest... these 12 months have not been all that difficult... until recently. There is one great discourager for those waiting for adoptions and I've been guilty of drinking from that fountain a bit too often lately... I'm talking about internet adoption forums.
Over on the Taiwan adoption groups, it seems that many people who were told 18-24 months (by different agencies... not ours) have now been waiting well beyond 24 months... some as many as 30-31 months and still don't have a referral. If you were in my shoes, this would be incredibly discouraging to you... you kind of prepare yourself for how long you think you can wait and 24 months to us is an eternity... the thought of waiting longer than that is almost unbearable.
What makes it so tough is that we're watching Connor grow up before our eyes. He's 5 years old now... if our wait stretches to the worst case scenario of let's say 36 months... add 6 months before we travel and that's 42 months... 30 months from now. Connor will be about to turn 8. That's not what we had in mind for our family. We realized that our kids were going to be pretty far apart but the thought of it going any further than we had originally anticipated is tough to swallow.
So yeah... lately the wait has been weighing heavily on us. It's so hard not knowing how long it's going to be... and knowing that some people out there are waiting 30 months plus is heartbreaking. I won't lie... we've thought about just trying to get pregnant and dropping out of the program.
However... God has a way of giving hope to the hopeless and I believe that came to us today. We found out this morning that another family from our agency received a healthy infant girl referral this past Friday... they waited only 8 months... the little girl is 2 months old. That's pretty huge... the biggest part of that news is that we found out that our dossier has been shown to a birth mother at least once. We weren't chosen, but we were presented. We didn't expect this to happen for many more months... for it to be happening already is a very good sign.
It's a rollercoaster... even the good news (like what we found out today) can leave you feeling worse. As the time creeps on, it seems like it occupies more and more of our thoughts. There's such an obvious hole in our family... Jessica and I both want to be parents again and Connor is such a sweet and wonderful kid... he's going to be an incredible big brother for Claire... even he can sense that our family is incomplete. The longer this goes, the more painful that missing piece of our family seems to become.
We'll continue to keep you posted on any news. Please pray for us to have peace as we wait and pray for our referral to come sooner rather than later... and join us as we celebrate having one year of waiting behind us. We're glad to have that one finished and as the Counting Crows once said... "there's reason to believe... maybe this year will be better than the last."
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Disney!
We had a great trip to Disney. We discovered that the trip is much more enjoyable and easier to recover from if you fly instead of driving twelve hours on both ends. Connor really enjoyed his first plane ride! I think we are forever spoiled! Hopefully Allegiant Air will keep offering awesome deals so we never have to make that drive again!
At the last minute, my mom decided to come with us, so we decided to try to find a last minute deal on a house. We were so blessed to find a really nice 4 bedroom house just a few minutes from Disney for less than we were going to pay for the hotel room! We really enjoyed having the space. We always say we are going to stay at a Disney resort the next trip, but we always end up getting a house. It is always such a better deal!
Day one at Disney was on Monday. It was an early morning since our flight got in pretty late, and we had a long drive from the airport. We spent the entire day at the Magic Kingdom, and by the entire day, I mean 14 hours! We had so much fun! It is still Connor's favorite park, and I know he's going to outgrow it soon. The thought makes me sad!
Day two was split between Hollywood Studios (which we still kept calling MGM, much to the employees' objection) and Epcot. Connor's goal before we even left was to get picked for the Jedi Training Camp at MGM. He was so excited to be chosen to fight Darth Vader and it pretty much made his whole trip. He even told me today, "Mom, you need to print off a picture of me fighting Darth Vader because no one at school is going to believe me!" We got to ride the new Toy Story ride, which was so much fun! We hung out at Epcot that evening, and of course no trip to Disney is complete without getting a box full of pastries in France. YUMMY! So glad that's only a once a year thing or we'd be in trouble!
Day three, Greg and I celebrated our ninth anniversary. Connor started feeling pretty yucky on Tuesday, so Nana, Mimi, and Connor stayed behind at the house and rested. Greg and I took the Magic Kingdom's "Keys to the Kingdom Tour" and it was so neat! We got to see all the behind the scenes stuff, rode a couple of rides, and found out all kind of interesting information. It was five hours well spent! That night we all went to Downtown Disney to eat at Wolfgang Puck's, do a little souvenir shopping, and we enjoyed some margaritas down by the water.
Day four, our last day, was Thursday. We split the day between Epcot and Magic Kingdom. We raced to Epcot that morning to get fast passes for Soarin' my absolute favorite ride in all of Disney! We all rode Spaceship Earth for the first time, and Connor randomly said it was his favorite ride in all of Disney. Very strange choice! We spent the evening at Magic Kingdom, got some pics with Mickey and Minnie, and headed out early since we had to catch an early flight. We stopped at Cracker Barrel for a yummy dinner and raced home to pack. We had to be up at 3:30 a.m. to leave for the airport in time to catch our flight. It was ridiculous! However, it was nice curling up in my own bed at 10 a.m. on Friday and going back to sleep!
Every year at Disney just gets better! We had a great fourth annual trip and were so glad Nana joined us this year! We had a great time!
Friday, March 13, 2009
Another Update....
We leave for the annual Disney trip in two days and we are so excited! We changed our original plans, and ended up renting a house in Orlando to stay for the week. Originally we were just going to stay for a couple of days and go to my mother-in-law's house for a few days, but my mother-in-law has a client who is going to get us some free tickets. Who can turn down changing a 2 day Disney trip into a 4 day Disney trip...not us! Also, my mom decided to join us at the last minute, and we are so excited for her to go to Disney for the first time. Connor is going to have so much fun with his Nana and Mimi. I wonder if he'll notice Daddy and Mommy are even there!
I finally made a decision about school.....I'm going back! I sent in my deposit to hold my place in the program yesterday. It is a year-long program. I'll begin in August and end next summer. The program is fixing to completely change, so I needed to get in while the administrative endorsement was easier to get. Just when I was getting my student loans paid down, I have to take out more! It's so stressful, but something that I feel like if I'm going to do it, I need to do it now.
Everyone keeps asking us about the adoption. No, we haven't heard anything. No, we won't hear anything for probably about two years. Right now people are waiting for the average of 30 months for a referral, then add 8-10 more months for court papers to go through before they can even travel to get their child. We're approaching our 1 year mark in a few weeks. I am beyond frustrated with the adoption lately, and quite honestly if it weren't for Greg encouraging me to hang in there, I would have given up two months ago after returning from Taiwan and the reality check we were given by the orphanage director. I never wanted my kids 7 or 8 years apart and we decided not to go with China for that reason. I am not pretending anymore that I'm not frustrated or angry because I am. I'm ready to go ahead and get pregnant again, so, if God has a plan, I hope he gives me some encouragement soon, because quite frankly, I'm ready to surrender. It's hard when you do what you feel God has asked you to do and feel like you have been totally abandoned. Two years ago we felt the calling to adopt, we've been faithful and patient, but there is just a limit that I'm reaching where I am starting to really feel completely hopeless. Connor desperately wants a sibling and I do not want to wait three more years for a baby to come into our home. I've been holding all of this in for a while, only talking to my closest friends, but I just don't understand it all.
So, I've been trying to distract myself from adoption depression with different things! Part of the reason I'm going back to grad school again...distraction. I've also been working out like crazy, and now have a new obsession with Pilates. How you cannot break a sweat but get an unbelievable workout, I don't understand, but this is definitely for me! Working out has helped to eliminate almost all the pain that I was feeling on the right side of my body. I'm still having a few problems with my sciatic nerve, but it's definitely improving! Greg is doing an awesome job on his health kick too! I'm so proud of him! He's lost five pounds. Connor loves going to the gym as well, and goes to "Kid's Club." It's been really fun to get healthy as a family. Another distraction I've found lately is with coupons. If you know me, you know I love a good deal, but lately I've been actively trying to see how much money I can save. It's like a game to me, and I'm having fun! Everything from eating out to groceries to stores, I'm getting some good deals!
Well, our next update will be from Disney! I can't wait to see Mickey! We'll let you know how Connor's first plane ride goes! Hope everyone has a great Spring Break!
I finally made a decision about school.....I'm going back! I sent in my deposit to hold my place in the program yesterday. It is a year-long program. I'll begin in August and end next summer. The program is fixing to completely change, so I needed to get in while the administrative endorsement was easier to get. Just when I was getting my student loans paid down, I have to take out more! It's so stressful, but something that I feel like if I'm going to do it, I need to do it now.
Everyone keeps asking us about the adoption. No, we haven't heard anything. No, we won't hear anything for probably about two years. Right now people are waiting for the average of 30 months for a referral, then add 8-10 more months for court papers to go through before they can even travel to get their child. We're approaching our 1 year mark in a few weeks. I am beyond frustrated with the adoption lately, and quite honestly if it weren't for Greg encouraging me to hang in there, I would have given up two months ago after returning from Taiwan and the reality check we were given by the orphanage director. I never wanted my kids 7 or 8 years apart and we decided not to go with China for that reason. I am not pretending anymore that I'm not frustrated or angry because I am. I'm ready to go ahead and get pregnant again, so, if God has a plan, I hope he gives me some encouragement soon, because quite frankly, I'm ready to surrender. It's hard when you do what you feel God has asked you to do and feel like you have been totally abandoned. Two years ago we felt the calling to adopt, we've been faithful and patient, but there is just a limit that I'm reaching where I am starting to really feel completely hopeless. Connor desperately wants a sibling and I do not want to wait three more years for a baby to come into our home. I've been holding all of this in for a while, only talking to my closest friends, but I just don't understand it all.
So, I've been trying to distract myself from adoption depression with different things! Part of the reason I'm going back to grad school again...distraction. I've also been working out like crazy, and now have a new obsession with Pilates. How you cannot break a sweat but get an unbelievable workout, I don't understand, but this is definitely for me! Working out has helped to eliminate almost all the pain that I was feeling on the right side of my body. I'm still having a few problems with my sciatic nerve, but it's definitely improving! Greg is doing an awesome job on his health kick too! I'm so proud of him! He's lost five pounds. Connor loves going to the gym as well, and goes to "Kid's Club." It's been really fun to get healthy as a family. Another distraction I've found lately is with coupons. If you know me, you know I love a good deal, but lately I've been actively trying to see how much money I can save. It's like a game to me, and I'm having fun! Everything from eating out to groceries to stores, I'm getting some good deals!
Well, our next update will be from Disney! I can't wait to see Mickey! We'll let you know how Connor's first plane ride goes! Hope everyone has a great Spring Break!
Saturday, February 28, 2009
What's Been Happening.......
We've been busy as usual this Feburay! Here's what's been going on:
We had a really fun Valentine's weekend with friends! Connor also had a fun Valentine's weekend with friends. Michelle was brave enough to keep him, Atley, and Ava for a few days, while the Watsons and us escaped to Kentucky and met up with the Haneys and Belows for a little getaway.
Connor had his five year check-up and failed three hearing tests, so we had to see an audiologist. He passed all hearing tests at the audiologist, but failed the articulation test. So, after filling out five million pieces of paper, we should be hearing something in the next week about him beginning a speech therapy program. He is going through an early intervention program that Knox County Schools has set up, so it's free, which is a HUGE blessing! Hopefully, he'll make progress before beginning Kindergarten in the fall!
Connor has also started gymnastics, which he absolutely loves! Every Tuesday he comes running out of class screaming, "I DID AWESOME!" He's quite the little monkey! He'll begin swimming lessons soon as well! He still wants to continue with soccer in the fall, but is content to do these things in the meantime.
The three of us also joined a Fitness Center. We're trying to get healthier! I haven't been able to run in forever because of some leg problems, and pounding asphalt is really painful, but I've found some different cardio machines at the gym that are working for me. Connor has had a blast in the pool, hot tub, and on the rock climbing wall! I think Connor and I are more excited about it than Greg, but he is graciously coming along for the ride!
After a lot of prayer, I have decided to give up Thirty-One because there are just not enough hours in my day! I had a great Fall with sales, made some great money towards the adoption, but at this point in time, just don't know how to balance it all! I am also praying about going back to school for my Ed.S right now. I have no idea what the right thing to do is, but I feel like it would be easier to do it now than when Claire gets here. I'm continuing to pray and won't make any decisions until I get I get more discernment.
I think Greg is the only normal one around here. I don't think he needs therapy or is giving up a side job or anything! He's our rock and our drama free family member!
We are excited to head to Disney in just two weeks! The three of us are ready to get out of K-town for a while! Our annual Disney trip is always the highlight of our year! I can't tell if Connor is looking forward to his first plane ride more or Disney!
Well, that's what's been going on in the month of February! Just a normal, crazy, month here for the Adkins family!
We had a really fun Valentine's weekend with friends! Connor also had a fun Valentine's weekend with friends. Michelle was brave enough to keep him, Atley, and Ava for a few days, while the Watsons and us escaped to Kentucky and met up with the Haneys and Belows for a little getaway.
Connor had his five year check-up and failed three hearing tests, so we had to see an audiologist. He passed all hearing tests at the audiologist, but failed the articulation test. So, after filling out five million pieces of paper, we should be hearing something in the next week about him beginning a speech therapy program. He is going through an early intervention program that Knox County Schools has set up, so it's free, which is a HUGE blessing! Hopefully, he'll make progress before beginning Kindergarten in the fall!
Connor has also started gymnastics, which he absolutely loves! Every Tuesday he comes running out of class screaming, "I DID AWESOME!" He's quite the little monkey! He'll begin swimming lessons soon as well! He still wants to continue with soccer in the fall, but is content to do these things in the meantime.
The three of us also joined a Fitness Center. We're trying to get healthier! I haven't been able to run in forever because of some leg problems, and pounding asphalt is really painful, but I've found some different cardio machines at the gym that are working for me. Connor has had a blast in the pool, hot tub, and on the rock climbing wall! I think Connor and I are more excited about it than Greg, but he is graciously coming along for the ride!
After a lot of prayer, I have decided to give up Thirty-One because there are just not enough hours in my day! I had a great Fall with sales, made some great money towards the adoption, but at this point in time, just don't know how to balance it all! I am also praying about going back to school for my Ed.S right now. I have no idea what the right thing to do is, but I feel like it would be easier to do it now than when Claire gets here. I'm continuing to pray and won't make any decisions until I get I get more discernment.
I think Greg is the only normal one around here. I don't think he needs therapy or is giving up a side job or anything! He's our rock and our drama free family member!
We are excited to head to Disney in just two weeks! The three of us are ready to get out of K-town for a while! Our annual Disney trip is always the highlight of our year! I can't tell if Connor is looking forward to his first plane ride more or Disney!
Well, that's what's been going on in the month of February! Just a normal, crazy, month here for the Adkins family!
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Help A Child Visit Washington D.C.
I made this plug last year, and I'm making it again!!!
Each year, the best of the fifth graders in our school system are asked to be members of the safety patrol. These are great students who work hard and show good citizenship. Every summer they have the amazing opportunity to take a trip with other Knox Co. safety patrol members. I chaperoned this trip many, many years ago and I had so much fun. It truly is a wonderful opportunity for the students!
Most of you know I work at a low income school. The cost of the trip is $410 per student. This is a very large cost, and most of our students can't afford it. We are trying to raise money through businesses and staff donations, but we need your help! Would you consider giving even a small amount to help send these kids to Washington? I know these are crazy economic times, but if you can spare even $5 dollars, please send it to:
Mooreland Heights Elementary
5315 Magazine Road
Knoxville, TN 37920
Attn: Jessica Adkins
If you'd like to send a check, you can make checks out to Jessica Adkins or Rachel Jett. We will divide the money evenly among the needy students and directly pay their fee to the travel agency.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
The Party!
Connor's birthday party was Saturday. Usually his parties are a little big, and I do all the food, gift bags, etc. myself. On Christmas Eve, it hit me that we were going to be gone for a week and a half, and I knew life would be crazy busy after we returned, so after opening presents, I called up Smart Toys and Books and told them I'd love to book a Star Wars party and was thrilled when they said they'd take care of EVERYTHING! It was money well spent, although it did feel a little strange Friday night with nothing to prepare for! We turned out to have more guests than we anticipated (14 Junior Jedis plus Connor), and the room was a little cramped and a little chaotic for my taste (I was trying to not act like a former teacher, but it was hard!) Connor said he had a blast, and it was wonderful to see how many friends my little social butterfly has! They played lots of games, dressed up as Jedis, ate a cool R2-D2 cake, and most importantly, had a giant lightsaber fight! Connor agreed to collect food to donate to a food pantry in lou of birthday gifts, and we collected a pretty decent sized box of food, plus about $28 in cash that we will give to the pantry so they can buy additional food. It was a great birthday for our little man....or I guess our big man now....sniff...sniff!
Friday, January 23, 2009
Happy 5th Birthday, Connor!
Here's what I remember about five years ago today....pain like I've never experienced, combined with puking on my doctor twice, add some more pain, and then the sight of the most beautiful creature I had ever seen of my life. I also remember these words....."Ten pounds point zero once ounce" followed by the shouts of my mother and mother-in-law..."Jessica!" "Are you kidding me??" I love to tell people he was ten pounds when he was born. As a skinny minnie as he is now, it's hard to believe, plus I'm not exactly built to house a ten pounder. I also love that fact that my sweet boy was sleeping through the night in a matter of two weeks due to all that extra body fat!!
There are so many things I love about Connor. Things that just amaze me everyday. His memory is crazy! He remembers things we don't think he should, things we think he's too young to remember. He has the funniest sense of humor, and we can already see he will be the class clown! He is so witty for a five year old! He has a innate musical ability already, just like his daddy. He watched the movie WallE twice, then got the soundtrack, and could tell me what scene every single song was from. He hears and understands music, just like his daddy! He's such a bright little boy with so much potential. He can built things from Legos by following the package direction pictures, with minimal assistance from Daddy. He's already reading simple sight word books, writing some, and using vocabulary words beyond his years. I am proud of and love all these things about Connor, but what I am proud of the most about Connor is that he has the most kind and tender heart that I could ever ask for. He truly cares about others, and he just loves with everything in him. This is my child who was excited when we asked him if he would be willing to forego presents at his party, and instead have his friends bring food for a food pantry. He responded by saying, "Sure, I'd love to help people with no food. I have a ton of toys, anyways!" I can only pray that he keeps his compassion through his whole life, and I will feel successful as a Mom!
I think what Connor wants more than anything for his birthday is a little sister! He prays for her nightly, asking God to keep her safe and bring her home soon. Always adding in..."We REALLY want to take care of her!"
I love you, Connor! Thank for you changing my world this past five years. I'm a better person than I ever was because you love me so much. I'm so proud to be your mommy, sweet boy!
(If you want to read a hilarious story about one of Connor's presents, click here to visit Greg's blog)
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Taiwan Pics.....Finally!
We keep meaning to post a slideshow of our pics, but we have been pretty busy and tired since we got back. I got a snow day today, so I thought I'd finally post. Enjoy!
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Last Blog from Taiwan
It's amazing what a difference a week makes. Tonight as we walked back to the hotel, I felt like I could stay here even longer. A week ago, when I walked the same street, I was absolutely terrified! The first time I stepped on the busy streets of Taipei on Tuesday, I wanted to run home! It was so scary, and the culture shock was overwhelming. I was wondering how in the world to communicate, what in the world I was going to eat, and honestly wanted to catch the first flight back to the U.S. While I still haven't gotten used to everyone staring at me, every other part of Taiwan has grown on us both. This is an amazing city with wonderful and kind people who have been so good to us. It is a place that Greg and I look very much forward to visiting frequently in the coming years. It's amazing that in such a big city, we've always felt extremely safe. To end our time here, I wanted to share a few more random things that we've noticed during our time here.
I saw rice for the first time tonight. Most people here eat noodles. You can't walk into a Chinese restaurant in the U.S. without getting rice, so I found this fascinating. We still didn't see an egg roll! The food here is incredibly cheap! Once we were comfortable enough after a couple of days to actually go into restaurants and try to order, we ate some really great food. We soon learned that most people do speak a little English and like Jodie, our cooking instructor told us, "If you want to spend money to eat, they'll find a way to handle you!" The one thing that has cracked us up is that you have to ask for a check, they won't bring it to you. There is absolutely no rush placed upon you here, and while it is a huge, busy city, at the same time people here are very relaxed and easy going. While everything is cheaper here, Starbucks is still the same price, and just like in the U.S., they are on every corner! Another interesting food fact, in U.S. the McDonald's have hot apple pies, here they are hot pineapple pies and they are quite delicious! There is also very rarely ice served in drinks. There are a ton of food options here, and you cannot even walk down a street without seeing several restaurants and many food vendors. Sometimes, some of the sights and especially the smells have gotten to me.
There are many, many people who live here in the city of Taipei! The people are not at all what I expected. They love to "bop around" and shop and eat, and even at 9 p.m. on a Sunday night, the streets and subways are packed. They all have little dogs that they dress up in outfits. They wear a lot of American clothing, and sometimes clothing with hilarious English translations. The children are extremely well-behaved, never loud or causing a scene. The people are also quiet and calm and things are very peaceful, despite the fact it's a large city.
There's probably more to say, but I'll let Greg finish it out. Overall, we really have loved this country, and though we are so eager to get home to see Connor, we are excited about returning, and seeing even more of the country. Hopefully on the next visit, we'll be able to bring a new member of the Adkins family home with us. As we were leaving the orphanage yesterday, Sister Rosa said to us, "I don't know how to say it in English, but in Chinese it means, more than destiny, more than fate." I think Greg and I both know in our hearts that it means whatever plan is laid for us by our God, who we will continue to be faithful to, despite how hard the wait is, and despite how much we want to control things. He is in control, and He knows our Claire.
Please pray for safe travel as we travel home tomorrow. Thanks for following us on this adventure.
I saw rice for the first time tonight. Most people here eat noodles. You can't walk into a Chinese restaurant in the U.S. without getting rice, so I found this fascinating. We still didn't see an egg roll! The food here is incredibly cheap! Once we were comfortable enough after a couple of days to actually go into restaurants and try to order, we ate some really great food. We soon learned that most people do speak a little English and like Jodie, our cooking instructor told us, "If you want to spend money to eat, they'll find a way to handle you!" The one thing that has cracked us up is that you have to ask for a check, they won't bring it to you. There is absolutely no rush placed upon you here, and while it is a huge, busy city, at the same time people here are very relaxed and easy going. While everything is cheaper here, Starbucks is still the same price, and just like in the U.S., they are on every corner! Another interesting food fact, in U.S. the McDonald's have hot apple pies, here they are hot pineapple pies and they are quite delicious! There is also very rarely ice served in drinks. There are a ton of food options here, and you cannot even walk down a street without seeing several restaurants and many food vendors. Sometimes, some of the sights and especially the smells have gotten to me.
There are many, many people who live here in the city of Taipei! The people are not at all what I expected. They love to "bop around" and shop and eat, and even at 9 p.m. on a Sunday night, the streets and subways are packed. They all have little dogs that they dress up in outfits. They wear a lot of American clothing, and sometimes clothing with hilarious English translations. The children are extremely well-behaved, never loud or causing a scene. The people are also quiet and calm and things are very peaceful, despite the fact it's a large city.
There's probably more to say, but I'll let Greg finish it out. Overall, we really have loved this country, and though we are so eager to get home to see Connor, we are excited about returning, and seeing even more of the country. Hopefully on the next visit, we'll be able to bring a new member of the Adkins family home with us. As we were leaving the orphanage yesterday, Sister Rosa said to us, "I don't know how to say it in English, but in Chinese it means, more than destiny, more than fate." I think Greg and I both know in our hearts that it means whatever plan is laid for us by our God, who we will continue to be faithful to, despite how hard the wait is, and despite how much we want to control things. He is in control, and He knows our Claire.
Please pray for safe travel as we travel home tomorrow. Thanks for following us on this adventure.
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Taiwan Journal #9 - Back to Cathwel
Yesterday morning we went back to Cathwel for a second visit. They're technically closed for the holiday but Sister Rosa said we could come back to spend some time with the children and we were really excited to get to do that.
We arrived a little after 10:00 and gave Sister Rosa the rest of the money that was donated by everyone at Powell Church... it came out to $15,000 (settle down... that's about $500 US) and she seemed to be very moved by this gift. She wanted me to thank everyone there for having faith in what they were doing. She insisted on getting our address so she could send us a card... she's really sweet.
After we gave her the gift she asked if we wanted to spend some time with the babies and we told her we did so we scrubbed in (you have to wear scrubs and get washed up before you can go in with the babies) and went into the baby room. The area where the babies are is split into 2 rooms with seven or eight babies in each room... there were about five people working there with the children. We spent about an hour and a half holding them and playing with them and they let us give some of them their bottle (we do it a little differently in America so they had to keep showing us how they do it). Fortunately on Saturdays, there's a woman named Susan who works there at Cathwel who grew up in Manhattan so she was able to talk to us quite a bit. She put some of our fears from our first visit at ease telling us that she has seen many, many children be adopted by families who already have children.
I could go on and on about the children... they are just beyond precious. Most of the children we were playing with had already been adopted and were just waiting to go home... there are some very lucky families somewhere out there in the world. There was one little girl in particular who just completely melted both of our hearts. She was just so sweet. Really all of the kids seemed to be really happy and they all were very anxious to be held and played with.
To anyone reading this who is adopting through Cathwel, the one thing I would have to say to you is that your child is being incredibly well cared for. We've heard stories of many Chinese orphanages where there are 50 kids with 2 workers and they never get held or anything... that's far from the case here at Cathwel. They are well staffed and the workers there really are great with the kids... you can tell that it's genuine and they really love the babies. They seem to all get a lot of attention, everything is incredibly clean, and the babies are happy... it's still an orphanage, but I can't imagine a better setup for the kids. They're really doing a great job.
One interesting thing that happened... while we were there with the kids another couple came in... it was an American man who had a Taiwanese wife and they were from Columbus, Ohio. They were here visiting and are thinking of starting the adoption process. It was neat to meet another family from the US and I would guess after spending some time with the babies they're probably about ready to sign up!
We didn't want to wear out our welcome so after about 90 minutes with the babies we said our goodbyes and headed back to the hotel. I think after this second visit, Jessica and I both feel a little more at ease with the whole process. The waiting is probably going to be a bit harder now having spent time with these precious little ones but that's alright. When our referral finally comes and we have to endure that long 8 months of waiting to travel while all of our court papers are prepared, we'll be able to imagine where Claire is, what she's doing, and who is taking care of her, and we'll know that she's being loved... that alone was worth the cost of this trip.
(any families adopting from Cathwel who have any questions at all, please feel free to email us and we'd be glad to answer any questions.
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